Training and Tyrants
The first thing we, the 50-and-over-oldsters, need to realize is that we are not built to compete with the fresh kids you see working out with Kettlebells online and on social media. Their expectations cannot be our results because we cannot compete at their level of strength and competition. We may come close. We may even match them; but few of us will be able to compete with, and sustain, their intrinsic stamina.
As we age, our shoulders become weaker. Our muscle done decreases. Our bone density starts its end into brittleness. We can overcome those obstacles, and even improve our chances for strength, balance, and vitality — but we need to first go about it with more discretion, and concern, than our younger gireviks (Kettlebell lifters).
If you are a new student to Kettlebells, you may have read some books, or done some online courses that attend to the idea of machismo and masculinity. Those books, videos, and DVDs press the claim that if you, as a man, are not double Pressing 32kg bells, then you are not living up to your potential. That’s Russian thinking, training, and ego contamination. Kettlebells first found their way in Russian culture, and then made their way to the USA via Russian trainers.
Do not fall for those old world masculinity tropes. Lift what works for you. Start with a light weight, and stay with it for 12 weeks, and then move up to a higher weight if you feel strong enough to handle the added load.
Now, some Russia-influenced instructors will tell you a dramatic jump is needed between bell weights when you are ready to lift heavier. They want you to make a “Pood Jump” — a “pood” is approximately 16kg (about 36lbs) — to the next bell and that’s a big leap for anyone to make from a 16kg bell to a 32kg bell, let alone when you’re over 50! There’s no reason to have to make that jump, and you will not be less of a man, if you opt for, say — half-a-pood, or an 8kg jump — from a 16kg bell to a 24kg bell. I prefer half-pood jumps, but you can make it an even smaller pood fraction if that suits you better. What matters isn’t how much you are lifting when you move up in weight, but how you are lifting, and if you are doing it safely or not.
There are many great online instructors who will virtually train you. If you decide to self-train, just make sure your form is right. Be wary that having the right weight bell is important. You want the bell to be heavy, but not too heavy; if the bell is too light, your form will not flow. A heavy bell that you can safely manage will force you to have the right form. You need to learn how to hinge, even if you don’t plan to Swing a lot.
I’m not big on Swings. I think they can more quickly hurt your lower back when you are starting out than doing Cleans, Presses, Squats or Snatches. I would not challenge yourself to achieve the social media task of the day, or even the “10,000 Swings Challenge” because your overall goal with your Kettlebells should be safely gaining strength, and losing weight, not Swinging to achieve some transient number of Swings. Your body wants to manage heavy weight, but not a weight that is constantly in motion, especially when you’re just starting to get used to Kettlebells. If your form is not perfect, 500 swings a day can hurt you. Concentrate, for now, on the muscle and not on pendulum velocity.
Now for a note on Tyrants. They are everywhere online, especially in the Kettlebell community. Voltaire said this: “Tyrants have always some slight shade of virtue; they support the laws before destroying them.” There are established experts who create a cult of personality that should alarm you. The best instructors teach you the right form, and allow you to find your own way. Those instructors who demand you adhere to their particular training usually mean they are only interested in your money. If a program claims to be a professional program, or a university, or a club — make sure to avoid those personality-driven routines because if you do not please the master, the master will not train you.
There are also Tiny Tyrants who — when given a little bit of power, like moderating online strong forums, or kettlebell discussion groups, or private membership pages — demand that you please them first in order to be heard. You will know you are dealing with a Tiny Tyrant when you see many advanced level users all around you, and very few new members with low approved messages numbers. That means the new folks are being moderated out of participation, and when the unwritten rules of the Tiniest Tyrants include not being able to speak out about having your messages hidden in queue so you are unable to reply to others because your comment is being held in moderation, well the only lesson left to learn there is to turn around and leave. Your value is your time. Your dedication is your insight. Don’t spend a second of your life trying to please those online Tiny Tyrants!
